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  • I've been looking to take up a new project for myself - being 100% honest for 2 full days and maybe if it works out well; then for 4 days and then a week. I was listening to Simon Sinek's talk and he said it's very difficult to be 100% honest and stick to full honesty for 2 days (48 hours). Sounds like no big deal; but it might just be. Studies show that we lie several times a day just to keep people around us happy, or hide our ignorance or avoid embarrassing moments or whatever. But we do.

    Lying, I believe, is a part of basic human nature. We do not take lies seriously because most of them won't hurt anyone; in fact, several lies would make people around you feel better. I'm not even sure whether being 100% honest is something we should really aim for; and whether we'll end up hurting people by hour brutal honesty.

    I remember the movie Liar Liar (starring Jim Carrey). The protagonist finds himself in a mess because he 'can't' lie but it all turns out to be good in the end. But that's a movie; I'm talking about real life.

    I'm curious to know whether you've had any experiences with honesty. Have you ever tried to be 100% honest? Would you like to be 100% honest for 2 full days?
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  • rahul69

    Member • Nov 20, 2013

    Kaustubh Katdare
    I've been looking to take up a new project for myself - being 100% honest for 2 full days and maybe if it works out well; then for 4 days and then a week. I was listening to Simon Sinek's talk and he said it's very difficult to be 100% honest and stick to full honesty for 2 days (48 hours). Sounds like no big deal; but it might just be. Studies show that we lie several times a day just to keep people around us happy, or hide our ignorance or avoid embarrassing moments or whatever. But we do.

    Lying, I believe, is a part of basic human nature. We do not take lies seriously because most of them won't hurt anyone; in fact, several lies would make people around you feel better. I'm not even sure whether being 100% honest is something we should really aim for; and whether we'll end up hurting people by hour brutal honesty.

    I remember the movie Liar Liar (starring Jim Carrey). The protagonist finds himself in a mess because he 'can't' lie but it all turns out to be good in the end. But that's a movie; I'm talking about real life.

    I'm curious to know whether you've had any experiences with honesty. Have you ever tried to be 100% honest? Would you like to be 100% honest for 2 full days?
    "Being Honest", in my opinion, can have a very broad sense which may include speaking truth (i.e. what is true according to you)
    Also "Truth" is relative, what may be truth for one, could be a total lie according to other person.
    So in my opinion, "being 100% honest" is quite possible 😀
    but being 100% truthful could be difficult. 😐
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  • Anoop Kumar

    Member • Nov 20, 2013

    Moment you lie you have to remember it . Why to waste extra Bytes of your brain keeping some useless data.
    lying might keep another person not hurt but keep hurting you.
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  • Nayan Goenka

    Member • Nov 20, 2013

    I manage to be about 98% honest daily. Not boasting off but yea it has a lot of things back fired on me. But my long term gains, only I know and I figured out they are the best for me. So I basically lie the least possible. Hope it helps you. When you say the truth, people hate you around you but yes, when right time comes and they understand the stuff, they do get more respect for you. But you really ought to be patient about it. 😛
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  • Kaustubh Katdare

    Administrator • Nov 20, 2013

    My primary concern is the 2% that you left out - and that's what this post is all about. We don't have to lie about everything; but we tend to lie about little things. For example, my wife asks me if the tea was good; and I 'may' say 'yes' or 'excellent' but I'm lying if the tea isn't good (PS: She's makes great tea is a fact and I'm not lying! 😀 )
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  • Nayan Goenka

    Member • Nov 20, 2013

    The 2% I ruled out was primarily the perceptional truth. Like you said about tea. Maybe sometimes the tea might not be good for you, but the other guy may like it very well. It comes to relative point somewhere and there that 2% goes. Like someone asks if the food is good in mess, if i didn't like it, i would say no. But maybe it was tasty for others. That is my 2%
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  • avii

    Member • Nov 22, 2013

    Let me warn you that this path is very difficult. And telling from my experience.
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  • Kaustubh Katdare

    Administrator • Nov 22, 2013

    avii
    Let me warn you that this path is very difficult. And telling from my experience.
    Share your experience with us, if it isn't very personal.
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  • Anand Tamariya

    Member • Nov 23, 2013

    This conversation becomes most interesting when people come asking for money. Instead of outright saying I don't want to help, my answer is I don't have it (which falls under lying in strict sense)!!
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  • Anoop Mathew

    Member • Nov 24, 2013

    Got caught standing in between the Ladies compartment and First Class of a Local passenger train just 8 months back in Kerala - with a General Ticket. Lots of folks in my compartment were also caught - apparently there was a recent rule change about 'standing' over there, which all of those folks standing there were unaware of. It was March end and the police were on the lookout everywhere as they wanted to fill their 'quotas' soon before the next fiscal year.

    My friends escaped by lying about their names (those bastards did not have any ID proofs with them). Me being the NRI guy was used to carry a valid ID with me where ever I go. Scrap my truth about my name, number and address, and pleading for mercy; I was summoned to a Railway Court hearing the next day (ofcourse with the other passengers), where I had to bring in a lawyer (in order to avoid paying the hyena of Police officers who were waiting to suck my blood). Ended off paying Rs 500 as fine, Rs 300 for the advocate (was my uncle's friend) - all for a Rs 10 ticket and the naked truth!

    So, does the truth hurt?

    Well, I like the truth. Keeps away tension. If I had lied about my name, number and address and the squad had checked my pockets, then I'd have gotten into more trouble. But to this day, I'm often quoted as the 'truth speaking joker' among all those people who know this incident.

    But again - does the truth hurt marriages? Of course it will! 98% truth is always better than 100%
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  • Anand Tamariya

    Member • Nov 24, 2013

    anoopthefriend
    Got caught standing in between the Ladies compartment and First Class of a Local passenger train just 8 months back in Kerala - with a General Ticket. Lots of folks in my compartment were also caught - apparently there was a recent rule change about 'standing' over there, which all of those folks standing there were unaware of. It was March end and the police were on the lookout everywhere as they wanted to fill their 'quotas' soon before the next fiscal year.
    I commend your honesty. But why should you paint the police as demons who were just trying to do their job?
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  • Anoop Mathew

    Member • Nov 24, 2013

    Anand Tamariya
    I commend your honesty. But why should you paint the police as demons who were just trying to do their job?
    They were clearly after a bribe! Got to know that from some experienced folk in the train as well as from the advocate. The advocate chose not to take me along because I was charged with a section number alone. The same advocate was handling 3 others 'same-train-similar-scenario' incidents. And surprisingly there were plenty of other cases that can be charged under that section. If I were to face a judge, I would first have to go through a long wait with the police officers - who would toss salad with me. So I opted for an advocate to attend the hearing.

    P.S.: There is some term used for hiring an advocate to attend a court hearing instead of you, but I am not able to recollect that word.
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  • Anand Tamariya

    Member • Nov 24, 2013

    anoopthefriend
    They were clearly after a bribe! Got to know that from some experienced folk in the train as well as from the advocate. The advocate chose not to take me along because I was charged with a section number alone. The same advocate was handling 3 others 'same-train-similar-scenario' incidents. And surprisingly there were plenty of other cases that can be charged under that section. If I were to face a judge, I would first have to go through a long wait with the police officers - who would toss salad with me. So I opted for an advocate to attend the hearing.

    P.S.: There is some term used for hiring an advocate to attend a court hearing instead of you, but I am not able to recollect that word.
    If there are plenty of incidents of law-breaking, doesn't make it a law. Police don't make laws - they just enforce it. If people think it's not appropriate, then they should fight for repealing it. If people keep taking the easy way out or flouting the law, inspectors will sure use that as an opprotunity to make easy money.
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  • Anoop Mathew

    Member • Nov 24, 2013

    Anand Tamariya
    If there are plenty of incidents of law-breaking, doesn't make it a law. Police don't make laws - they just enforce it. If people think it's not appropriate, then they should fight for repealing it. If people keep taking the easy way out or flouting the law, inspectors will sure use that as an opprotunity to make easy money.
    Sure. But I was at a disadvantage there. Can't really do much talking and explaining in my mother tongue - malayalam. It's not like I didn't want to, but couldn't withstand something without fully understanding the system. And, I wanted out of it ASAP as I did have other priorities.

    I had other experiences earlier (twice at the college and once at a railway station) where I got into trouble trying to set things right (by being truthful). Maybe I just 'grew up' and let the expert do his job.
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  • Anand Tamariya

    Member • Nov 24, 2013

    anoopthefriend
    Sure. But I was at a disadvantage there. Can't really do much talking and explaining in my mother tongue - malayalam. It's not like I didn't want to, but couldn't withstand something without fully understanding the system. And, I wanted out of it ASAP as I did have other priorities.

    I had other experiences earlier (twice at the college and once at a railway station) where I got into trouble trying to set things right (by being truthful). Maybe I just 'grew up' and let the expert do his job.
    If finding the wrong way out is what is "growing up", I'd rather never grow up!!
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  • Anoop Mathew

    Member • Nov 24, 2013

    Anand Tamariya
    If finding the wrong way out is what is "growing up", I'd rather never grow up!!
    Wrong way out? How is this the wrong way? Please advise. It's perfectly okay to opt for an attorney to handle your case is what I know.
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  • Neda Hashmi

    Member • Nov 25, 2013

    it is possible to be honest..but it is not possible to be honest WITHOUT hurting other people sentiments. unless u live in such secluded place that nobody comes in contact with you
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  • Anand Tamariya

    Member • Nov 25, 2013

    anoopthefriend
    Wrong way out? How is this the wrong way? Please advise. It's perfectly okay to opt for an attorney to handle your case is what I know.
    I was pointing to the "learning" you had mentioned from earlier experience - not the current one.
    I had other experiences earlier (twice at the college and once at a railway station) where I got into trouble trying to set things right (by being truthful). Maybe I just 'grew up' and let the expert do his job.
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  • Anoop Mathew

    Member • Nov 25, 2013

    Anand Tamariya
    I was pointing to the "learning" you had mentioned from earlier experience - not the current one.
    What was I supposed to learn then? When you fail 3 times and get your ass whooped all those times for all the wrong reasons, would you still stick to your old selfishness of getting things done your way (which I regret to be as young and rebelious as it was) or think about it (which I did) and opt for the smarter way out? I am not going to explain more my friend. I just 'listened' to elderly experienced advice and 'obeyed' it for the last experience. That was what I learned from other experiences. Now I know that if I had the proper guidance during those times those first three experiences would not have turned out that bad. Do you still think I didn't grow up from those experiences?
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  • Anand Tamariya

    Member • Nov 25, 2013

    anoopthefriend
    Do you still think I didn't grow up from those experiences?
    I'm willing to fail 100 times - but don't buy the argument that our elders are right even if they are teaching me the wrong thing.

    PS: I don't enforce it on others either.
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  • Sarathkumar Chandrasekaran

    Member • Nov 29, 2013

    I like and try to be honest and i follow the saying of Tirukkural that any lie that dont hurt anyone at anypoint of view is good.So lie and remember that it should not hurt anyone in any way😀👍
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